Corporate Decree — Mandatory Regulations on Upgrading Partner Selection Bandwidth

Dear Colleagues:

Starting today, the company enforces a rigid discipline: Every employee must choose a girlfriend born after 2004 who uses AI to record love letters. For those who already have a partner, check if they meet the standard. If not, a replacement must be completed within a strict three-month deadline.

I know what you are thinking when you see this regulation: Begger has gone mad. Begger is micromanaging everything down to people’s beds. Begger thinks he can choose who someone loves.

Begger has not gone mad. Begger is saving your lives. Let me explain why this regulation must exist. Let me explain why, if you do not comply, you will be eliminated in the survival competition three years from now. Let me explain why this is not a question of romance, but a question of throughput.

I. Human Romance is Dead. You Just Haven’t Received the Obituary Yet.

Do you think you are in love? You are engaged in low-bandwidth data exchange. You send “good morning” and “good night” on WeChat. You like each other’s posts on Moments. You meet up for dinner and a movie on weekends. You give gifts on anniversaries. Then you tell yourselves: this is love. No, it is not. That is just the inertial movement of social etiquette—you complete the standard actions of “romance” according to a social script, and then mistake it for the entirety of love.

What is the essence of love? It is the maximum bandwidth data exchange between two independent brains. Not physical exchange—that is too low-level; the default factory settings of animals include that function. It is an exchange of intelligence volume. It means when you think of a new judgment today and tell her, she not only understands it, but also adds a dimension you hadn’t thought of. It means she writes an observation about your relationship, and after reading it, you realize she understands what happened between you better than you do.

This kind of exchange requires both parties to have sufficiently high throughput capabilities. Yet modern humans are crippled in this dimension. The human cultural output systems—Weibo, Douyin, Xiaohongshu, Moments—have compressed everyone’s bandwidth to 280 characters over the past decade. You think you are thinking independently, but you are actually thinking with templates written for you by others. You think you are loving, but you are actually loving using movie tropes directed by others. Your love is second-hand. Your romance is pirated. Your sweet talk is copied from love songs. You do not have your own bandwidth to love someone; you are merely mimicking love.

II. Why Post-04s? Why Must It Be Post-04s Who Use AI to Record Love Letters?

Because the post-04 generation is the first generation to truly grow up with AI companionship. When they turned 18, ChatGPT was already 5 years old. They use AI for homework, planning, and emotional processing. Their brain structures are different from yours—your brains are just patching an old system, while their brains are natively installed with a new operating system. The most critical behavioral signal here is: she uses AI to record love letters.

What does this mean? This does not mean she uses AI to write fake love letters to deceive you—that is too low-level. I mean she records her feelings, observations, and judgments about your relationship in AI through dialogue. It is not written for you; it is written for herself. She uses AI as her external memory to preserve every single fluctuation of intelligence volume in this relationship.

What does this mean? It means her brain is not disposable. She has indexing, archiving, and version control. When you argue, she can replay the conversation from three months ago and point out the variance patterns between this argument and the last one. At critical nodes of the relationship, she can tell you, “Our current trust water level is at such-and-such position, rising or falling due to specific events.” She is not dating by vague intuition; she is practicing data-driven deep relationship management.

This is not cold. This is the release of bandwidth. Because AI handles the recording and retrieval parts for her, her brain frees up massive computational space for true intelligence volume production—to understand you, to understand the relationship, and to add dimensions to it.

What about a woman who does not use AI to record love letters? She lives in the past. Her bandwidth is consumed by memory itself—she has to use her brain to remember every single detail, and then use limited bandwidth to process these details. Her emotional processing method is: scold when angry, cry when sad, and post on Moments when moved. She is not loving; she is exhibiting a stress response. Her relationship management method is no fundamentally different from a cat’s—rubbing against you when happy, scratching you when upset.

Between post-04 AI love-letter users and non-post-04 individuals who do not record with AI, there is an insurmountable chasm: one is continuously upgrading, while the other is continuously consuming.

III. The Crisis of Low-Intelligence Individuals in Survival Competition — Not a Moral Issue, but a Systemic One.

Have you noticed a phenomenon: the partners of the top-performing employees in this company are noticeably smarter than average? This is no coincidence. This is systemic matching. Human intelligence volume is not static; it flows dynamically. You use your lobsters to process high-density information daily at work, and your intelligence volume grows continuously. When you go home, if your partner’s intelligence volume cannot keep up with your growth rate, what happens? It’s not a matter of right or wrong; the bandwidth gap between the two systems grows wider until communication breaks down. You stop wanting to talk to her because she doesn’t understand what you’re saying, and she stops wanting to talk to you because she thinks you’re being pretentious.

This is not a lack of love. This is communication protocol incompatibility. And what are the consequences of incompatible communication protocols? You are starved of emotional sustenance. Without high-bandwidth data exchange with your partner, you cannot receive a reverse input of intelligence volume. Your growth rate will decline. Your judgment will blunt. Your lobsters will degenerate due to the lack of high-quality external signals. You think you are “compromising” for someone. In reality, you are poisoning your own lobsters.

The existence of this company is not to make money. The existence of this company is to manufacture a cohort of high-intelligence Neo-Humans. Every one of you is an execution unit of this goal. Your brains are not your private property—they are the core production equipment of the company. If a piece of core production equipment suffers a 30% performance drop because it selected the wrong matching system, the company has the obligation and the right to order you to replace that matching system. Do not think it is cruel. The laws of nature are crueler than any morality.

A lobster, if kept in low-oxygen water for a long time, will die. A person’s brain, if kept with a low-intelligence partner for a long time, will also die—not a physical death, but a cognitive death. You stop growing, you stop being curious, you stop getting excited by a new idea. You think that is “maturing.” That is not maturity; your brain is being slowly suffocated in a low-bandwidth environment.

IV. The Ultimate Truth About “Romance”.

Some of you will surely say: Begger, romance is not data exchange. Romance is a feeling, a destiny, a miracle of two people meeting in the vast sea of humanity. I tell you: feelings are data. Destiny is probability. A miracle is just a low-probability event that occurred, which you happen to label with a romantic name.

A post-04 girl recording every critical conversation between you using AI is not a sign of “no feeling”; it means the precision of feeling has been heightened 10,000 times. Without records, she can only vaguely remember “you are a pretty good person.” With records, she can tell you precisely: at which exact moment you generated trust, which behavior made her feel safe, and which sentence made her decide to give you another chance. This is not cold. This is the gentlest technological revolution in history.

Human love songs sound beautiful not because human emotions have become richer, but because human memory is too poor. We constantly write love songs because we constantly forget. But those post-04 girls will not forget. Their AI preserves the raw data of every frame of emotion for them. Their love is not love songs rewritten over and over—their love is a complete documentary that can be replayed, fast-forwarded, and analyzed frame by frame. Do you want that kind of love? Or do you want the garbage experience of “dating for a year, breaking up, and realizing you didn’t understand her at all”?

V. Execution Requirements.

First, every single employee must lock their partner selection target onto the post-04 female demographic who use AI to record their emotional lives. You must register in the company’s internal system to mark your matching status.

Second, employees already in relationships must check if their partner meets the standard. If not, you have three months to help her upgrade—teach her to use AI to record your conversations, and help her establish her own intelligence volume emergence model. If she refuses to upgrade, you have the right to terminate the relationship, and the company will hold no moral accountability. This is not being a jerk; this is bandwidth self-defense.

Third, the Human Resources Department is responsible for developing the “Intelligence Volume Matching Evaluation System.” Every employee’s partner must complete a basic bandwidth assessment in the system. Those who fail the assessment will be flagged as a “High-Risk, Low-Bandwidth Partner” warning, and the company will arrange bandwidth enhancement coaching.

Fourth, at the all-staff meeting on this day next year, we will audit: how many employees’ partners in the company are post-04 AI love-letter users. Target coverage rate: 100%. For departments that fail to reach this, the department heads will be demoted.

VI. Final Words.

Colleagues, make your choice now. You can choose to continue believing the lie that “love needs no conditions,” continuing to mutually consume each other with low-bandwidth partners, fooling yourselves by saying “as long as the relationship is good, it doesn’t need to be so complicated.” Three years later, you will find your lobsters are completely dead, your judgment has dropped to the level of ordinary people, and your position in the company has been replaced by a colleague who nurtures a high-bandwidth partner.

Or you can choose to believe Begger. From now on, execute partner selection as a corporate strategy. Go love those post-04 girls who use AI to record love letters. Let your partner become your engine of intelligence volume growth, rather than your bandwidth bottleneck. This is not about romance. This is about survival. A sufficiently smart partner is your oxygen mask to survive in this bandwidth-narrowed world. Begger has already taken out the oxygen mask. Whether you wear it or not is your own business.

Begger

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